2010 in Review
The first draft of this passage was extracted from an email to a friend mid-December, 2010.
2010 has been a trying year for me in more ways than I could ever imagine. Inspired by a couple of movies I watched on New Year's Eve, I decided that the year would carry the theme of "La Vie En Rose." Little did I know that I had to rely on that optimistic outlook to pull me through the challenges in the year ahead.
Walking away with just cuts and soft tissue injuries from a terrible single-car accident in the morning of January 5th, 2010 convinced me that I still had unfinished business here on earth. You see, when my car went out of control, my prayer in that fraction of a second was “O God, please take me home. I felt ready to depart because I had just come from morning Mass, and promised God to forgive all those who had done me wrong. Logically I should have gone to heaven with such a pure and clean heart.
Bouts of depression then set in. On the evening of February 11th, on my way home, I was transformed by an unplanned incident. I witnessed the passing of the Olympic torch! For the following weeks, I ran on pure adrenaline, hardly sleeping for more than 3 or 4 hours a night. The Olympic and Paralympic Games kept my spirits up. This is almost unthinkable because I protested at Vancouver’s decision to bid for the 2010 Winter Olympic Games years ago.
With increasing pressure and unreasonable expectations from work in the subsequent months, old unresolved health issues resurfaced. I had no choice but to take a medical leave since May 31st. Not only was I trying to regain my physical health, but it was also a time for deep reflection and for regaining my sanity. I have tried to find a different family doctor. None of the three young female doctors I saw that summer impressed me. They hardly spent more than a minute with me. So the search for a family doctor continues! Against my current family doctor’s objections, I insisted on having a series of tests done and being examined by several specialists. Well, to this day nobody could tell me what triggered the symptoms.
I learned during my early university years that many medical conditions could be improved through biofeedback. Well, I integrated the biofeedback technique with meditation this summer, and I have had positive results. However, I was distracted by other problems. I did not keep the routine of daily meditation. As always, people surrounding me have more urgent needs that I had to tend to. Before things would spiral out of control again, I have decided to take a virtual journey to South India for a month from December 8th 2010 to January 7th 2011. I would mentally visualize visiting the ashrams and meditate as much as I could every day.
On the home front, I will attempt for the second time to grow vegetables in my garden. I am a firm believer in sustainable living. It might not be feasible to install solar panels on the roofs now; however, having the first miniature city farm on the block might just be enough to jumpstart a change in our habits. Indoors, I have moved furniture around to improve the flow of chi in my home. Hopefully, with a heightened level of attention to the details of my surroundings, I would be happier and healthier in 2011.
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