Reflections

  2015 Reflections reconstructed in 2026 – Finding the missing piece in a jigsaw puzzle of my life I was travelling in Central America when I got an urgent email around mid-January from my sister that she had to return to work after taking a family leave for three months. I had to make a short turnaround in Nicaragua and return to Vancouver mid-February to take care of my mother who had suffered a stroke. I was her primary caregiver for seven months. It was Chinese New Year’s Day when I landed in YVR. I was told to stay in an unfurnished room in the basement of my parents’ new house. The basement was cold and moldy. I slept on an old mattress on the floor. At that time, my mother was staying in a 2-bed ward in a rehab hospital. She was going through occupational, physio and speech therapy. Everyday, I would travel by bus and stay with her in the rehab hospital for 6-8 hours. That routine lasted for about a month until my mother returned to her own home. In order for my mot...

The passage was extracted from an email to a friend around Christmas 2014. I started 2014 in Rarotonga, Cook Islands. I waited several months for a cargo boat to go to one of the outer islands in the Northern Group. The flying option was limited to a few more touristy islands in the South. Originally I was very disappointed with this failed attempt to see the legendary “live off the land and sea" way of life. In Rarotonga, I finally settled into a very simple way of life. Even though I did not do much physical work and ate regularly, I lost a substantial amount of body weight. It could be because I was eating mainly fresh and non-processed food. My spiritual life also grew. I used to have at least an hour of reflection every night on a rooftop overlooking the sea, and under a blanket of stars. I returned to Vancouver in mid-April and spent most of my time cleaning up my parents’ old house. Looking at things that were stored away so many years ago, surely brought back a lot of me...

This passage was originally published in Heaven on Earth in December 2013. It was moved to Reflections in June 2026. Sapi Island, Malaysia At the beginning of this year, as I embarked on my Oceania journey, I had high expectations of the Land Down Under. I was looking forward to visiting the mystical Ayers rock and one of the natural wonders of the world, The Great Barrier Reef. My Australian visit turned out to be rather disappointing, mainly because of the intense heat and high cost of living everywhere in Oz. Then it rained pretty much the whole time for the week that I visited Fiji. As a result, cruising around off-shore islands appeared to be totally out of the question. By the time that I got to ‘Eua, an island 45 km from the main island of Tongatapu in Tonga, I rode a rented bicycle with no hand brakes without first assessing the risks involved. In a way, the bicycle accident in ‘Eua was a blessing in disguise. The Tongans restored my faith in mankind. During the week that I was...

The first draft of this passage was extracted from a email to a friend at year end of 2012. It has been a year of decisions and moves. When I moved out of the housing co-operative where I had lived for almost four years, the projec t I spearheaded was close to completion. Moreover, my physical and psychological health had deteriorated to the lowest point that I had ever experienced. Nothing seemed to help! What good would low rent and a good location be if I was in constant misery and conflict with my neighbours? I evaluated the quality of my life and realized it was time to move. In April, I moved back to stay in a basement room in my parents’ house. I left the housing co-op a much better place than I found it. The residents in the century-old buildings would not have to deal with deplorable living conditions and structural issues anymore. Vancouver was no longer the small city that I have loved all these years. It might still be one of the most livable places on earth listed by inte...

The first draft of this post was extracted from an email to a friend at Christmas 2011. On New Year’s Day 2011 , I decided that this year was going to be a year of change . I even set New Year’s resolutions which I haven’t had for decades. Out of the seven goals, I have accomplished five so far. I cannot see how I would be able to organize a non-profit housing society or produce vegetables from my miniature city farm (a.k.a. the soil patch outside my living room) in less than two weeks. What are the other five goals then? To review and re-organize my finances in such a way that I can have a simpler and better lifestyle. To declutter my home so that I would know where everything is. To fully utilize my talents and capabilities to make a difference in this world. To live more healthily. To better prepare for my departure from this life. In addition to setting these goals, I also determined the steps to achieve the goals and benchmarks to measure succe...

The first draft of this passage was extracted from an email to a friend mid-December, 2010. 2010 has been a trying year for me in more ways than I could ever imagine. Inspired by a couple of movies I watched on New Year's Eve, I decided that the year would carry the theme of "La Vie En Rose." Little did I know that I had to rely on that optimistic outlook to pull me through the challenges in the year ahead. Walking away with just cuts and soft tissue injuries from a terrible single-car accident in the morning of January 5 th , 2010 convinced me that I still had unfinished business here on earth. You see, when my car went out of control, my prayer in that fraction of a second was “O God, please take me home. I felt ready to depart because I had just come from morning Mass, and promised God to forgive all those who had done me wrong. Logically I should have gone to heaven with such a pure and clean heart. Bouts of depression then set in. On the evening of February 11 th ...